the girl

I want my happy ending.

I want no mistakes and no regrets 

and the lesser of two fear based decisions.

I want my chance I want my scare

I want my adventure.

I want to know what could be 

and what might have been 

and never have to ask 

what if.

So what if evil is greater 

and what will ruin me more 

to lose and leave behind?

What girl did I used to be?

What girl am I supposed to be?

Which girl did I think I'd be?

What girl am I in my dreams?

I want a great romance...

to live my life

as the romantic idealist that I'll always be.

But am I the girl who runs away

with the great storybook imperfect love?

Or do I turn my back and play the part 

of the girl who has a lifetime of saying she 

left behind her love long ago to have a career 

and this was the choice she made.

Either way both are too impossible to bear.

I want no outside forces to influence

but only the heavens to inspire 

as I blaze my trail ahead... 

now with all the burn, blaze 

and fire I can muster...

2004